“Be Aware Of The Road, But Stay In Your Lane.” “The Mind’s Chaos Can Create Distortion Of The Truth.” Nigel D St. Hill
Dear friend, why should we go through the experience of surrender? Why let go of who we think we are? From one point of view, we might feel we have a lot to lose. However, from a different angle, we have everything to gain from disengaging from our limitations.
Through surrender, we move from helplessness to hope, from destructiveness to the promise of creativity, from depression to inspiration. From the absolute bottom, we begin to progress toward the possibility of a healthy, fulfilling life.
Why is the experience of surrender so challenging? Why do so many of us have to be pushed against the wall, beaten into defeat by our addictive behavior, before we let go? One reason is that surrender often requires a change of identity, giving up the idea of who we are.
As human beings, most people firmly identify with the small self, with our ego existence as an individual with a strong sense of who “I” am. We relate to ourselves as material entities within a limited reality.
Going beyond our narrow self-definition can be frightening. It feels as though we are being asked to give up our identity completely. Even though the surrender has the potential for spiritual expansion, many of us are so disconnected from our deeper selves that letting go implies dropping into the unknown.
What will we have if we surrender? Ironically, letting go of who we think we are is essential if we are to change. Just like letting go of one activity is necessary for something new to happen, surrendering the small self is necessary to know the deeper self and integrate it into our life experience.
Moreover, many of us build our lives around being in control. We have created strategies for survival in an unstable world, forming a superstructure of defenses, denials, and creative coping devices that give us the illusion of power.
Because many of us are afraid of change, we hang on to what we know. Our known reality, even though it might be unpleasant or difficult, offers some degree of perceived safety. When confronted with an alternative to our customary mode of operation, many of us shy away. We feel safer if we stay within the confines of our familiar prison than if we risk breaking out.
Cultural roles can serve as further obstacles to our experience of surrender. For example, many males in our society are raised with the expectation that they must remain strong, effective, and always in control.
‘Real men’ don’t cry, is the implicit masculine directive. ‘Real men’ don’t let down their guard, expose their feelings, or display their vulnerability. If men were to do that, they would lose part of their identity that has been assigned to them by our culture.
In conclusion; we can surrender to the things in our lives we can do nothing about, change those we can, and work toward developing the wisdom to know the difference. The practice of letting go becomes the way of facing challenges.
We step back and allow our deeper resources to guide us, even though we do not do it completely and perfectly each time. As we continue, we realize that many layers of surrender occur in stages.
We might release what feels like a significant amount of ego control, only to uncover many more subtle and not-so-subtle levels of the same experience. With the guidance of others who have gone before, (see my book To Boldly Go Where I Have Not Gone Before – now available on Amazon) we continue to practice letting go until we can increasingly allow the river of life to carry us.
Until next time, make this a month in which you live your life to the fullest.
Love, Peace, Appreciation, and Gratitude
Nigel Of EDS Barbados and The Caribbean
Life Coach and Author
Website: https://www.nigelsthill.com
If it resonates with your heart, I invite you to share it with your family, friends, and contacts. I would appreciate this. Remember we are stronger together.
If you found value in these insights and wish to explore more, please visit my website https://www.nigelsthill.com, and sign up for my monthly blogs.
You can download your complimentary eBook, Uncover Your True Potential Through Self-Awareness, which has been specially developed for you. It provides you with a blueprint for your heart’s desire.
Click the link below for my latest book – To Boldly Go Where I Have Not Gone Before on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/author/nigelsthill
Click the link to Tropical Literature: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/8ZnibLJv-AI?themeRefresh=1
Also Available At The UWI Cave Hill Campus Barbados
Click the link below for more of my books on my website: https://www.nigelsthill.com
Online one-on-one coaching is available via Zoom/Skype/ Phone
Online Courses and Webinars are also available. Visit: https://www.nigelsthill.com
I would love to hear from you. Leave a comment on my website or send your email to nigelsainttwo@gmail.com
Tel: 1 (246) 228-1155
WhatsApp: 1 (246) 244-4784
Skype: nigeldsthill